World Inside a Grain of Sand

Why is it so hard to be as good as I want to be? I seek a certain perfection...not perfection as we might think. I am not a perfect success. I am not a perfect writer, poet, artist. I was not perfect in my careers. I am not a perfect husband or father, although those attributes would be worth the challenge I think. I have not perfectly challenged and beaten back the fears and anxieties of life, although I have spent some thought and time seeking that. The perfection I seek is more one of attitude and disposition. I want to achieve perfection in understanding, compassion, empathy, love, forgiveness. On the surface it may seem that these attributes are simple, free, instantly accessible. We do not have to cross an ocean to find them. We do not have to climb tall mountains seeking them. We do not have to hone our skills for years to know them...or do we? Can an eternity of compassion be found in a moment? Could all the love of the cosmos be contained in a small box just in front of me, within reach, if I could only, truly open my 'eyes' and see it? Could love, compassion and all that I seek be contained in that grain of sand in my pocket?

Why is it hard to be as good as I want to be? Perhaps I am where I am meant to be...need to be...