Saturday, September 18, 2010

Don't Cry Over...

Maria was busily cleaning up from the party the night before. As she headed to the kitchen with wine glasses, one fell from the tray, spilling red wine on the carpet. She set the tray on the counter, retrieved a rag, and tried to soak the wine from the carpet. "This is never going to come out", she thought as she scrubbed at the spot on the worn carpet.

It had only been a month since Maria had crossed the border from Mexico, seeking a new life far from the ravages of poverty at home in Mazatenango...could this accident ruin her hopes?

"Mr. Thomas would be home any minute", she thought as she continued scrubbing. Would he fire me, send me back home? He seemed a kind and gentle man, not easily angered.

Maria heard the front door open, then close. It was Mr. Thomas. "Hello Maria, how was your day"? Before she could answer, she began crying. "Senor Thomas, I am so sorry I spilt the wine on your carpet".

Sensing her sincerity and distress, he held her and kissed her forehead. "Don't cry over this, dear Maria". At that moment their lives changed forever.

This little piece of writing is in response to Saturday Centus, a prompted, creative writing meme. The prompt is in bold type. Please take a moment and check out some wonderful writing at Saturday Centus. Thanks to Jenny Matlock and her wonderful 'mentoring'.

Jenny Matlock


  1. Oh Jeff, I wonder where his intentions were...Perhaps I shouldn't go there but I couldn't help it. I am glad she didn't get fired though!!!

  2. Wow Jeff, what a unique way to take the prompt. I liked this alot, you captured her fear and insecurity beautifully. But I've now got that old War song stuck in my head - "Spill The Wine"

  3. Terra...remember, he was "a kind and gentle man", sensitive to others. As for the rest of the story...Maria is young and quite pretty, perhaps 20 or thereabouts. Mr. Thomas is maybe 30 or so, a single architect, somewhat out of place in an old house. He is not blind and has noticed Maria's 'qualities', although, up to that point had refrained from 'going there', considerate of the situation and not one to take advantage.

    Kat...I actually thought to name it "Spill the Wine", but it did not agree with the mood of the story...

    all in all, I'm just a sucker for a love story...I guess you noticed that ;-)

  4. This was really great. I'm wondering though how their lives changed. I could vision many possibilities here.

  5. ooo, talk about an interesting start to a new relationship (at least it feels like that's where it's headed). I'm glad that he didn't get angry at her and fire her! Great job!

  6. what a understanding man. Its funny how small things like that can make you feel for the situation your in - especially the girl in your story

  7. I liked this, Jeff!

    (I'm a sucker for a love story, myself...)


  8. Oolala ...I'm thinking romantic. Perhaps Mr. Thomas had those intentions in mind when he hired Maria. Hummm.~Ames

  9. Oooo!All set for another story. Mind I'm not sure that was just 100 words! ;)

  10. Jeff---If you had had more than 100 words (although I think you DID pad the 100-word limit a bit), I would have liked to hear a little more about Maria's past life.

    It's nice how the ending is left for the reader to imagine...

  11. I'm hoping it was a nice, grandfatherly kind of kiss, and not some lecherous old man taking advantage of the help kinda thing.

  12. Sounds like something is brewing...nice story!

  13. A nice, sensitive portrayal, Jeff, and a unique take on the prompt. Nicely done!

  14. OK, my mind went the other direction. To the taking 'advantage' direction but I like what you meant better than what I imagined.

    Maybe I do need some more shrink work on my messed up head!

    I re-read it again from where you said you were going and it was definitely a lot sweeter! And the second time around my female militant protector of sisters of the 'hurt' got to just enjoy this story.

    Thanks for your story. You are such a sweet guy.

  15. Unusual thinking here Jeff. Very creative. But.. did she get to keep her job? Or what happened. Personally, it would have been enough for me if he just smiled and said "That's alright. Anyone can have an accident and spill." or something like that. But no. You lead us on. Please write what happens....
    Best wishes,
    Sara Cat sends purrs.
    Anna's SC-Week-20
    Sara Cat's SC-Week-20

  16. To all of you who saw the wrong side of this story...that is so sad. As much as this type of story could go in a bad direction...well, that would not be me. I am too much of a romantic for that. The key to where it was going was the line..."He seemed a kind and gentle man..."

    For those of you that desire closure to this tale, it will be forthcoming.

  17. Dear Jeff,

    Is this a love story, after all? It is a beautifully written description of the angst of a young woman in fear for her job. It is the picture of a victim cringing in anticipation of another blow. Then there is the man. His chaste kiss on the forehead leads me to believe that nothing "happened." I think he just proved to her that he had a heart and could be trusted.

    Yours in optimistic bliss,